Suicide in time of fearing loss of iman or getting completely astray

30 Jun 2024 Ref-No#: 6090

Is it allowed to suicide if i fear completely falling astray? I used to be good in deen but i am not even praying properly, slowly losing everything, can I repent from wrong and suicide? Or what else can i do? Can i make a female friend if I believe it can help me stay on deen, and i also increase some good deeds, like 2 extra nafl daily, please not that i cant marry right now and i other solutions like making friends, going out, having a hobbie etc wont work in my situation, also if i dont lower my gaze and listen to reels with music, while dont see them as bad sights, please also note i cant sleep and my brain doesn’t work properly and go thorough other health issues like foggy brain if i dont do these points. Please answer this, I appreciate it alot. May allah keep you safe.

Answer

Wa ‘alaykum as-salām wa raḥmatullāhi wa barakātuhu,

I fully recognize that feeling overwhelmed and struggling with one’s faith can be incredibly distressing. However, suicidal thoughts are a serious symptom of a deeper issue that requires immediate professional intervention. The symptoms you describe, like sleep problems and brain fog, further indicate depression or anxiety.

Islam unequivocally prohibits suicide. The sanctity of life is a core principle in Islam, and taking one’s own life is considered a grave sin. Allāh says in the Qur’an:

‌وَلَا ‌تَقۡتُلُوٓاْ ‌أَنفُسَكُمۡۚ إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ كَانَ بِكُمۡ رَحِيمٗا [النساء: 29]

“And do not kill yourselves [or one another]. Indeed, Allāh is to you ever Merciful.” (Qur’an 4:29)

Suicide is seen as a rejection of the mercy of Allāh and a failure to trust in His plan. Instead, Islam encourages turning to Allāh in times of distress and seeking His help and forgiveness. No matter how far one may feel from Allāh, His mercy is always greater. Allāh says:

قُلۡ ‌يَٰعِبَادِيَ ‌ٱلَّذِينَ أَسۡرَفُواْ عَلَىٰٓ أَنفُسِهِمۡ لَا تَقۡنَطُواْ مِن رَّحۡمَةِ ٱللَّهِۚ إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ يَغۡفِرُ ٱلذُّنُوبَ جَمِيعًاۚ إِنَّهُۥ هُوَ ٱلۡغَفُورُ ٱلرَّحِيمُ [الزمر: 53]

“Say, ‘O My servants who have transgressed against themselves [by sinning], do not despair of the mercy of Allāh. Indeed, Allāh forgives all sins. Indeed, it is He who is the Forgiving, the Merciful.'” (Qur’an 39:53)

Furthermore, engaging in an illicit relationship is a trick of the devil. There is no way that engaging in Ḥarām can be a means for you to be stronger in your Dīn. What is the need that the ‘friend’ has to be a female? Why can you not obtain the same benefits from a male? Please ignore and fight these temptations of the devil.

Repentance (Tawbah) is always possible and highly encouraged. The process of Tawbah involves feeling genuine remorse for past sins, stopping the sinful behavior, and making a firm intention not to return to the sin. Regular prayer, reading the Qur’an, and making Du’a are essential steps in reconnecting with your faith.

Practical Steps:

  1. Repentance: Turn to Allāh with sincere repentance. This involves not only feeling genuine remorse for past sins but also taking active steps to rectify them. Commit to leaving behind harmful behaviors and make a firm intention not to return to them. Repentance is a powerful way to cleanse the heart and renew your connection with Allāh.
  2. Remembrance of Allāh: Engage in regular Dhikr (remembrance of Allāh) to find peace and tranquility. Dhikr involves repeating phrases of praise and supplication, such as “Subḥān Allāh” (Glory be to Allāh), “Alḥamdulillāh” (Praise be to Allāh), “Lā ilāha illallāh” (There is no deity beside Allāh) and “Allāhu Akbar” (Allāh is the Greatest). This practice helps to keep Allāh in your thoughts throughout the day, fostering a sense of calm and spiritual well-being. Regular Dhikr can alleviate stress and provide solace during challenging times.
  3. Supplication: Make Du’ā, asking Allāh for strength and guidance. Du’ā is a direct line of communication with Allāh, where you can express your fears, hopes, and needs. Pour your heart out to Allāh, seeking His assistance in overcoming your struggles. Consistent Du’ā helps reinforce your reliance on Allāh and strengthens your faith. Remember that Allāh is always near and ready to respond to sincere supplications.
  4. Spiritual Counseling: Speak to a knowledgeable and compassionate Islamic scholar or counsellor in your community for religious guidance and support.
  5. Seek Professional Help: Immediately reach out to a mental health professional. Suicidal thoughts require urgent attention from a therapist or psychiatrist. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) can be effective, and medications may help manage symptoms.
  6. Build a Support Network: Engage with a support group, either in person or online, to share your struggles and find encouragement.
  7. Friendships: Rather than contemplating forming close relationships with non-Maram females, seek the good company of males who could inspire and motivate you.
  8. Increase Good Deeds: Start with small acts of worship, such as two extra Nafl prayers daily, and gradually increase your acts of worship.
  9. Healthy Distractions: Find productive distractions like volunteering, reading, or physical exercise.
  10. Reduce Exposure to Harmful Content: Gradually reduce exposure to music and content that does not align with Islamic values. Set small goals to reduce time spent on such activities.

Remember, the struggle you are facing is a test, and every test from Allāh has a purpose. Persevere with patience and seek help. Allāh is always near and ready to help those who turn to Him.

If you feel overwhelmed, please contact a mental health crisis line or emergency services in your area. Your life is precious, and seeking help is a sign of strength. Use the time on earth to build your Jannah and contribute to mankind, rather than contemplating ending your already short life.

May Allāh guide you, grant you ease, and protect you. Āmīn.

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