Did 6 istikhara but unable to find the signs

19 Jan 2022 Ref-No#: 2570

I’m in love with someone but he don’t love me. We are not in contact with each other but when we were in contact, he messages me 1 times or 2 times in a week and sometimes 1 time in 2 weeks. So when I misses him I prayed to Allah that Allah please make him msg me and I gets his msg. So I came to know that whenever I will pray to Allah Allah will send him to me. I didn’t prayed before but his love made me closer to Allah. He never talked about my body or any other zina things, he only talks about education, job etc. Now, we are not in contact he left me because I told him my feelings for him. He said he’s a play boy and though he played with many girls feelings but he’s having sympathy with me he said I think Allah has accepted your prayers. He’s having good deen and he’s a prayer. I misses him now, I became closer with Allah I only talks about him to Allah only, now, Allah is the only one who knows the secrets inside my heart. I cutted myself from everyone I isolated myself. I’m engaged to my cousin and I don’t have feelings for him. I did six istikhara but I’m unable to read the signs neither positive nor negative. I don’t know what to do, I was so depressed and wasn’t in peace but being closer to Allah I’m too much in peace now nothing bothers me no tensions no worries idk why, I started forgiving everyone and I handover all my thing to Allah . But the only thing I came to know that is that by being in love with him I become closer to Allah so I thinks he’s good for me. I really want him. Can you tell me what to do? Because I’m already away from that person and the only thing I do is pray, pray and only pray. I’m having kamil yaqi’n I do beleive in miracles that Allah will surely make him my destiny

Answer

WaʿAlaykumus Salām Wa Raḥmatullāhi Wa Barakātuh

From the very onset, it should be noted that your prior communication with him (being a non-Maḥram to you) was impermissible as per the laws of the Sharīʿah as laid down by Allāh ﷻ Himself, irrespective of whether the conversations were only restricted to education or not. We, therefore, encourage you to seek the forgiveness of Allāh ﷻ in this regard.

Secondly, if you are not happy to marry your cousin, then it is imperative that you do not so, for marrying him whilst not wanting to do so is quite unfair and oppressive.

Thirdly, when you are unsure regarding the outcome of your Istikhārah, then opt for the Sunnah practice of Mashwarah i.e., to consult members of your family who will provide you with guidance and hold you in the best interest.

Fourthly, it is of no avail if you wish to marry him but he does not feel the same.

Lastly, we advise you to invoke Allāh ﷻ to grant you a spouse who will be best suitable for you, for Allāh ﷻ knows best – better than we all do.

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